GRIEF Poem: Tacoma Shores, by Sufyan Holmgren

I remember
when I’d sit on the edge of a boat
watching little crabs scuttle across the shore.

I remember
when you’d buy me seafood
under gray skies at Pike’s Place.

I remember
when I’d cry every step along the way
when you’d scream and kick like a child
when you’d neglect and refuse to pray
when I’d keep things to myself

Now it’s too late.

Even after death you refuse to see me
when you’re burned and buried hundreds of miles
away from me.

I remember
when you’d cry with yellow eyes and wrinkles of regret.
The biting cold was comforting then.

I remember
when I’d walk alone
thinking of what I could’ve done better
after I refuse to see you.

I miss you, dad
and hope to be indifferent
the same way I watched crabs along Tacoma shores.

I hope to recollect
your caring for me

and my beating heart.