GRIEF Poem: Too Tired to Title this Poem, by Diya Misri

I’m trying,
I’m tired,
Heavy eyes,
Dragging limbs,
Bubbling resentment,
Burning anger,
I do not remember
Joy.

I’m trying,
I’m tired,
Pretend positivity,
Longing laughs,
Suffocating panic,
Helpless,
I perform
An award-winning act,
I shall continue
Till the mask
Breaks.

I’m trying,
I’m tired
Of chasing perfection,
Excellence escapes my grip,
Perfect performer,
Deceiving illusion,
Praying for someone
To see right through it.

I’m tired
Of trying
To keep fixing
My mask,
Tired
Of praying for help,
Pleas
Falling on deaf ears,
Perfection achieved
Through deception.

I do not remember,
I cannot remember,
Why can’t I remember?
Joy.

Escaping hope,
Consuming fears,
Tired……

I cannot
Anymore.