TRAGIC Poem: Do You Remember?, by Greg Kousoulis

December 2013 to January 2014: under a painted title (DOOR OF SHAME), you Sharpie’d a grade on my bedroom door, rating every game I played. Little did you know, those permanent letters not only superseded basketball and felt like a reflection of your love, but marked me, despite your several layers of paint and apologies

Well…
I shouldn’t space my lines
so you’re
small mind
can read such
big
words
– of
damage(s) you’ve
caused
and how
much
It
hurt.
How about now?
A door to a room
where i rest a head
in hopes of feeling
safe
from people like you
Does this ring a bell?
The clock strikes twelve
hitting once for each
grade you gave
marks teachers wouldn’t dare
but from you(?), lashes handed
politely
funny how soft blows
from known hands
cut worse
than unknown
wounds
from piercing
shots
Do you remember now?
paint bleeding on a door
eyes drawn to stenciled hate
your word bombs
didn’t suffice
but sufficient was
your:
black paint
on a white
Entrance
DOOR OF SHAME
in finest scrawl
//
this
night,
you
dug
a
grave //
hard
to
breathe //
i
haven’t
left
that
(bed)
room
since
you
buried
(my
worth
&
i)
alive.
irony is
you meant no harm
straightening me out
in ways you knew
i know now
you played the hand
you were dealt
, just sometimes wish
you shuffled
the deck,
maybe a little luck
would’ve done
us some good.
… I love you too, Dad.

P.S. Remember how D+ was the highest grade you gave your only son?

Author: poetryfest

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