GRIEF Poem: Amazon Boxes, by Courtney Roberts

When I added the pill box to my cart,
He was beside me in the car.
Driving by run down, shitty bars
His green eyes never left the road.

It was silent,
The air lingering with anger.
Anger that hooked its claws,
And refused to let go.

Hours wasted
Arguments over regiments,
The lack of medicine
Consumed over the last year.

Medicine to keep you here.
Didn’t you want to stay here?

All I know is I’d take over your medicine,
You could be angry about it too.
I’d keep you on this side of heaven,
Even if I killed myself saving you.

Florescent lights flashed us in the blue.
The white gown faded your pale, freckled skin.
You tried to argue again,
I leaned in and kissed you.
“Please,” your lips were colder than sin.
Then the doctor came in.

They wheeled you back.
I st r u g g l e d t o l e t g o.

Your hand slipped from mine,
An hour later,
They said things went fine.

So you can imagine my shock,
Opening an amazon box
I ordered for the deceased.