Poetry Reading: the rose period, by Uma Jagwani

Performed by Val Cole

POEM:

professor says,
“picasso had a blue period, which was later followed by a rose period.
people tend to associate the blue period with melancholic sentiments.
& the rose period, with its opposite.”
but professor, i sense lingering melancholy
in his rose period, too.

need money? get naked.
need money? don’t paint.

1.
“red is light, red is love”
but why is the red-light district the dimly-lit
alleys where sex workers eye their clients,
& where sex shops sell dildos that
you know your parents never bought?
& why is moulin rouge so heart-wrenching?

2.
papa, red is the color of your leaving:
a blow i could never bandage. but it was
cadmium red, like my buttcheeks after a spanking
from you, for not getting math equations.

i get it—
you said life isn’t fair, not all sunshine & roses,
but i tried to leap over
the other side of the equal sign, over
the crimson massacre on the page, from never finding x
but i found x in the xena that you made me.

if you saw blood,
would you ask if it hurt?

3.
self-portrait as picasso,
heart on a montmartre easel
googling the going rate
for a titty pic,
painting portraits
of my patrons,
picasso, gertrude stein,
me, my father,
who pays so i can make
still lifes of red-distilled worlds,
sans a red-light district visit,
yes, i’ll paint a portrait,
of you, papa,
in infrared, or blue
on this scar, you etched
& will never ask about