GRIEF Poem: Lucid, by Stephanie Gonzalez

Somewhere,
In the fleeting moment between relaxed awareness and all-encompassing sleep,
There lies an instance of opportunity.
A small window in time where the dreamer is freed from the confines of reality-
Free from extra weight around the waist, free from unpaid balances, free from politically driven division.
In this moment the dreamer becomes the creator -with the option of limitless scenarios
bound only by the extent of imagination.

Knowing this chance will come and go,
I waste no time on extravagant settings.
I silently step on a simple sand path, beckoned by the sound of distant waves.
The way is lit by the light of the moon and a spectacular set of stars.
Completely uninhibited by clouds.

My heart begins to thud in anticipation as I draw nearer to the waters edge.
The path opens up to a wide shoreline where my eyes meet the pinnacle of the vision.
My love. My love. My long-lost love stands waiting with extended hand.
Untouched by time, unburdened by loss, unaffected by the savagery of death.
I run forward with everything in me, while the periphery of the vision starts to blur.
Your arms wrap around, we crumble to the ground
I exist solely for this embrace.

The strength of the vision is waning, my mortal body craves the rest of REM.
First the moon and stars vanish, next the waves and the sand of the shore.
All that is left of the vision is you and I.
The catalyst of my deepest desires.
You and I.

Gripping with all of my strength
I desperately fight an inevitable truth.
That I can’t keep you here, that you’ll still disappear,
that I lose you more each year.

My love.My love.
My long-lost love if only I had a choice.
I would choose this feeling over everything.
I would exchange this moment for the remaining years of my life.
In the final seconds of our union, you place your hand upon my heart.
It emanates a warmth that permeates the ribs, and every tissue hardened by scars.

Until tomorrow, my love-
I guard the warmth you left on my soul.
I anxiously await our next embrace
down the path of a dream by the shore