On September 5, 2022, my younger brother, Frederick Parsons known lovingly as Freddy and Phoenix Fred was murdered in Nanaimo, British Columbia. He was only 29 years old. Two men were charged with manslaughter in connection with his death. They each received eight-year sentences. Eight years for taking a life. Eight years for taking my little brother. Freddy was more than a victim of violence. He was a kind and gentle soul, always drawn to the vulnerable, especially animals. He couldn’t walk past a hurt creature without trying to help. That was just who he was, someone with a soft heart in a hard world. Freddy loved photography, and could find the beauty in everyday life. Freddy and I were adopted together as children. Though life took us in different directions as we grew up, we were working on getting to know who we had become as adults. We had started planning a reunion two months before his death, just the three of us birth siblings for the summer of 2023, something we had dreamed about for more than a decade. That reunion will never happen now. Losing Freddy has changed everything. I look at the world differently. I’m more cautious, more guarded. Strangers make me nervous in a way they never used to. I keep my children closer. My sense of safety has been shattered. I still have a hard time eyeing now almost 3 years later believing that he is really dead and I’ll never see or talk to him again. What hurts the most is knowing that someone so full of life and kindness is gone and that the justice system gave his killers less than a decade behind bars. It doesn’t feel fair. It doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t reflect the value of the life that was stolen from us. This article isn’t just to share my grief, though that grief is endless. It’s to remind people that behind every crime, there’s a family left to pick up the pieces. There’s a story, a heartbeat, a future that will never be lived. Freddy deserved more. He deserved justice. He deserved a long, happy life. And we deserved more time with him. I hope that in telling his story, others will remember his name, his spirit, and how fragile and precious life really is. Rest in peace, Freddy. You are loved. You are missed. Always.
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