PARODY Poem: Dodgeballery, by D.F. Salvador

‘Twas bleak and my slimy foes
Did gain throughout the game
So flimsy were my teammates’ throws
At last, only I remained.

“Beware the dodgeballs and run!
Don’t lose your fight and make the catch!
Watch out for Eric Anderson—
He’ll try to finish out the match!”

I took the orange ball in hand
One against ten I fought.
And while my ousted teammates cheered
One—two—three balls I caught.

Soon, one against five is how it stood
And Anderson with eyes of flame
Charghed across the shlippity wood
And snarled, hissed, and aimed.

One two, one two I ducked and threw—
My orange ball made a smack.
I’d hit his head so hard and firm
He landed squarely on his back.

Finally, it was one on one
And my teammates cheered with joy:
“Way to play! Hooray Hooray!
You’re the miracle dodgeball boy”

‘Twas bleak but my slimy foes
Did fall before my aim.
But flimsy was my final throw
It was caught — I’d lost the game.