Genre: Religion, Inspirational
Gone:
Goodbye opportunity to set the record straight
Farwell comfortable silences , whispered and screamed love songs to Jesus in attempts to beat the
summer heat
Long dreary days
Tear stained eyes
Hard to deal with attitudes and personalities larger than life
Differences of opinion, divergent paths we walk on
Yet there is love between us buried amidst this madness
And that’s why it aches so much inside my heart
Cos there is no turning back the hands of time
I will never get that period back again
When I could have filled in the blanks
Told you all those things you didn’t know about me
I don’t think I ever will
Even if I get the chance
Cos there are some things you are better off not knowing
Even if problems become halved when we distribute them out amongst your blood and flesh
Why would I want to make your life more difficult by struggling to summon up the love required
In response to my situation
I’d rather not make your life a simulation of a living hell
Far better for you to continue on with your life in happy smiling ignorant bliss
Than to possess the knowledge that your own kindred has done something dreadful
Trespassed upon the unthinkable boundary
Crossing the threshold into the dark realm of undiscovered country that should have remained
Unkempt and free of exploration by absolutely anyone
My soul was cannibalized and colonized like a colon cancer
And I do not possess the answer within me
As to why I would allow my mind to become deceived in this way
Yet that is the biggest reason why our time has been thieved so rapidly
Why I find myself desperately rushing my words hoping to create some semblance of normality
In the way the two of us relate
Even if you think my mentality is out of date
You never said as much to my sweet and sour indulging face
You never completely gave up on me
As I did you
Dismissing your very existence
Shunning you like the pilgrims once did
As if that would bring your eyes any closer to heaven
And pull you any further away from a hellish future
Oh so scornful am I of the way you live your life
Yet when faced with temptation I cave I crumble just as you once did
So who am I the high and mighty one fallen off his haughty Clydesdale
Regaling you with mystic charm the bale of hay wailing in your arms
Is it a more dangerous thing to possess
Arms if you be an amputee or just like me limbed and reckless
What if everything we once loved and cherished about the way we relate to each other
Has disappeared forever beyond the horizon’s vanishing point
You are far more charitable towards me in your thoughts than I ever was to you
And I wonder why I deserve such grace when all I ever do is spit in your face
Just treat you with contempt and act like I’m exempt from responding to kindness
With something other than cruelty and disdain
Some other mood than irate closed off disregard for human life
Leaving you alone to do your own thing
While I tread down my path, aloof head in the clouds
Can I be any more like Jesus I ask myself
Can I start over , act as if the preceding weeks had not been a challenge
To keep the nightmares bursting out my head
To draw you deeper in my dark callous net
If only I could perfectly reflect
The love I aim to emulate Jehovah gives me
If I had but the will and strength inside me
To overcome my straying towards worldliness
V2
What I am really angry about
More than anything else in the world
Is mostly myself
For allowing all these hours to slip through my fingers
Was it fear of confrontation
Funny that I didn’t have a problem with starting controversy
Courting it as if I was its betrothed bride
And yet in the heat of the moment look at me
See how I shrink away inside myself
When provided with the chance to stand up for righteousness
Not wanting to humiliate or cause pain to my fellow womb room sharer
Desiring anything but to push you away into the shadowlands
I have dabbled with the darkness for far too long
That’s why I’m trying to protect you from its encroaching cloaking devices
I don’t know how to disagree with you and keep things amicable between us
It seems like my words just wound when I want them to heal and soothe
I need the Lord to take control of my mouth and set a guard on my lips
Transform my mind so I can deal with the challenge of preserving it from wickedness
Can we have a get together without going over the same old familiar topical territory
Must our home always be the location for verbal sparring
What is the point or purpose to our endless warring
Isn’t this supposed to be a time of generous spirits
Are we not called to love one another and bring peace, joy and love to the world
How can we do that if it doesn’t exist within our own home
We are divided amongst ourselves when we should be a united front
Us against the universe
Or at the very least being used as a catalyst
To bring this galaxy in submission to Jehovah
Convince souls to bow the knee willingly before we are coerced and compelled by blazing fiery eyes
V3
I remember a time when we possessed far more similar looking minds
When His power and His glory was our enduring passion
Before the fashions of society dictated our response to His gospel truth
Before the rules of some countries lorded it over our willingness to live out our faith
When it contradicts the popular opinion of the day
Did we forget sin is as old as time
It goes back to the most perfect garden that ever lived and breathed
Why are we so surprised that evil and poverty still exist in the world
It is not because of our deeds always that sickness occurs within us
Though diet and exercise has a lot to do with it
Both its presence and its absence
Some starve themselves for the sake of affection
Yet find a greater affection in starvation than the arms of an angel formed in human shape
Time is a precious commodity we have in short supply
I watch it fly on by like butterflies out the window
I don’t attempt to catch it just let it drift on , go
Above those maddening crowds and saddening clouds
Putting a dampener on my swimming at the beach plans on Christmas day
Not that it matters if a tradition is upheld
If it gets in the way from our view of the cross
And the cradle of a manger where our sweet saviour once lay
The focus of our attention should be drawn to Him always
How to deal with what I feel
When our saviour is gone from this earth
But not from our hearts
I have to keep on believing and telling myself
That He still lives in you no matter how far you appear to drift from Him in your ideology
You still claim to know Him you still cling to His love desperately
Like a drowning man sinking in the sea of seemingly limitless possibilities
We have far too many options these days of what to believe in
Yet God’s truth stands alone in its uniqueness
The only God who ever claimed to be the truth itself
The only God who ever gave His life to save the world
To save it from the damage
Swords it drew into itself thrusting madly
Like a wolf not seeing the frozen knife in the ice hole
Dipped in the blood of seals
In frenzy piercing itself with furious illogic
We cause ourselves harm when we drift from His arms
When we try to make our own godling
When we ascribe His goodness to ourselves and our badness to His mindset
Yet our sins do not fully describe all that we are
We are not them though they may belong to us alone
We are so much more than meets the eye
And yet we judge each other based only upon what is revealed by glancing at our surfaces
Do we not see
The hands of heaven working behind the scenes
To pull us closer to salvation’s kingdom
Do we not hear
The voice of trumpets calling us
From beyond the grave like mental state of selfishness
Into a holy state of being absorbed wholly in Him
V4
The conflict of humanity remains
Ever unresolved til the return of Christ
There is so much left unsaid
For fear of upsetting the delicate balance between us
So many of our feelings we kept locked up within the cavern bound cupboards of our soul
For the sake of dodging sniping bullets of sarcastic wit and plastic versions of authentic expression
The seasonal smiles of presumption on the part of the customers to always remain correct
The urge to uphold tradition to provide a home of hospitality and create a welcoming atmosphere
The dear and tender moments , once cherished long since neglected
Those activities we once indulged in that lit a flame of tenderness within our youthful hearts
Like washing lines of Christmas cards and oversized socks only suitable for gargantuan feet
Barely recalled snowmen with carrot stick noses and coal button eyes
Scarves wrapped around their necks and somebody’s hat probably dad’s laid atop its crumbling mug
Drinking warm cups of cocoa and egg nog so often anyone would think they were our drug
Cutting off a slice of a life we left behind in the foggy wintry past
V5
As bits and pieces of your language become transformed , mangled and tangled
When learning a new tongue forces you to deteriorate in knowledge of your own
As your way of relating to the world alters and you seem to grow yourself a second skin
The casual lackadaisical attitude we grew up with appears forced unwelcome in your being
Not sitting comfortably with the prim and proper strict and punctual manner of behaviour
You have grown accustomed to in later years
My teardrops fall for the passionate crusader you once were
For the negotiations and compromises you made within yourself
Decisions you might argue you were forced to make by necessity
Not choosing who you love or willing to lose an argument in order to maintain a lasting friendship
Possibly unaware of the pressure you exert upon blood flowing unrestricted through his pores
I know it’s about more than settling old scores for you
Why are you endlessly attempting to bring us all round to your point of view
Can’t you just let the matter rest
Let it die with the dodos
I know it is a tragedy that we should just lock up this topic and
Leave it as just one of many things we are not long allowed to talk about
For fear of treading on sensitive toes
But better that scenario than this cold war exerting all the strength
Exhausting all the love, suffocating any compassion between us
Why must we always be forced to take sides
Can’t we talk about something anymore that doesn’t result in volcanoes of hot fury
Erupting suddenly when wires get crossed and confusion thrives
Our sweet honey hive was never meant
To harbour such disillusionment
We shouldn’t have to play pretend
To mend our shattered chain of hearts
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