Read Poem: Broken Ties, by Joanitah Rebecca Mbeiza

She called me twice and I did not pick up. Why? I was too pissed at her for snatching my boyfriend.

She did it intentionally. I know it because when we were young I and her boyfriend by then fell for each other and they broke up.

She acted so ok all these years. I thought she had forgiven me and forgotten about the incident.
All along she was packaging her trap.

She now had the audacity to call me.
She thinks everything is about tit for tat. I treasured her and it wasn’t my fault that her by then boyfriend loved me. Even then she had obstructed his focus on me to herself.

The stars were on my side when he told me everything and we started the journey of love. Though it didn’t last long. It was worth it.

Am beating myself up for not picking up her phone calls earlier because of that childish reason. I called it betrayal but what is happening now is true betrayal.

She is no more. Dead. Gone with the winds. What really happened I can’t tell but I let her down. She trusted me to save her but I was filled with pride thus ignoring her calls.

She needed the best friend she had in me despite our differences but I failed her. She is probably with the angels now or wherever destiny put her. Probably she regrets trusting me with her life.

I heard from my ex – the one she snatched that she was eight months pregnant and wanted to spend her last pregnant days with me. She had left the house in such a hurry.

She didn’t see the other car coming from the other side. Within seconds, she was no more. Will you ever forgive me my bestie? I don’t deserve your forgiveness but am truly sorry.

How I wish I had put my pride aside and answered your call. Maybe we would have talked things out and resolved them. Maybe I would have told you to stay at home and I come for you.

The innocent baby is also gone.
Am eaten up with guilt and blame.
I don’t know what to do. Am ashamed to have been called your bestie because I failed you.

My heart is so heavy. My eyes are too swollen. I have no more tears to shed. Am just empty and lost hoping you would forgive me for not being there for you when you needed me.

Not seeing pretty you to fight with and have laughs with anymore is going to be too much for me but maybe I deserve the heart wrenching pain or maybe not.

Your fiancee – my ex boyfriend has told me to forgive myself as it would be what you would want for me BUT it’s too hard. How can I live past the knowledge that I caused your death?

Please, tell me, how can I? Maybe if you tell me that you have forgiven me, then, I would find a little bit of peace. I am going to miss you forever.
Pride kept us apart.

What we had between us all became broken ties when we chose to betray the trust we so much valued just for the sake of love. We thought living apart was it, forgetting we had a stronger bond.

I can’t say how much am to miss you but I regret all the times we quarrelled and fought and turned our backs to the fights and left things unresolved. Had we known better, we would have been living the kind of life we dreamt of.

A life of pure bliss and fulfillment.
But that is now a dream lost.
One day I will get to meet you again and we will get to do all that we planned together but for now I wish you a nice sleep my bestie.

Am trying so hard to heal and live a better life for us. I know you are watching over me and sending me your warmth. Take care till we meet again. But, before you go. Can I have him back?


Author: poetryfest

Submit your Poetry to the Festival. Three Options: 1) To post. 2) To have performed by an actor 3) To be made into a film.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: